So you’ve been dating a gorgeous woman for a while, and now you want to invite her back to your place. You are looking to impress her, you’re eager to have some quality time together at your home. This is a wonderful thing, and certainly signifies that this match is going somewhere, so you want to make sure everything is just right.

We talked to a bunch of women about what puts them off, what they notice, what they have seen at a guy’s house and loved and what they have hated. And we put it all here into a few easy-to-follow checklists so you can better understand the inner workings of women’s minds, at least on this subject.

You know that first impressions are important, and that a big mistake may put her off at this early stage of dating. So, if you want to keep her smiling, and you don’t want this to be your ticket straight back to singles town, keep these 3 things in mind when you invite her over for the evening:

1. Clean up

Clean is comfortable. There are some guys that are clean freaks, and most of the ladies we talked to love you for it. They said that a messy or dirty place was a total mood killer. So for the rest of you here is an easy guide to follow.

You don’t want her to be worrying about touching, sitting or standing somewhere that she might get dirty, sticky or catch something from. Even if you don’t think it is all that bad in your place keep in mind that we all tend to be a bit more comfortable with our own mess and dirty than we are with other people’s. So a clean place will go a long way to set her mind to thinking about you versus the mess/ dirty/ general grossness that your bachelor pad may have accidentally slipped into. Sometimes it happens so gradually that its hard to notice unless you see it with a fresh set of eyes.

The bathroom is by far the most important room to clean because it is the most noticeable when it is dirty. The women we talked to said a dirty bathroom is a definite turn off and reflects a lot on the cleanliness of the guy and how comfortable they feel. Expect that she will be there long enough to use your bathroom so here are some points to keep in mind:

• Clean the toilet. Not just in the bowl but around the back of the seat, under the seat, on top of the seat, on top of the tank… pretty much the whole porcelain throne. And please put the seat and lid down. To be clear, that is down towards the earth, not up towards the sky, got it? This will take you from frat boy to refined gentleman in most women’s eyes.
• She needs toilet paper, make sure there is an extra roll available so you don’t run out. And get the good stuff! If your toilet roll is cheap and limp, what does that say about you?
• Change the towel – when was the last time you changed the hand towel anyways? If you don’t have a hand towel, put a clean bath towel close to the sink. 90% of the women we talked to said a dirty hand towel at a guy’s place grossed them out. We think the other 10% must have dated OCD clean dudes. Do don’t risk it and change the towel.
• Fill up the soap dispenser. If it is not full there is always that gross idea that crosses her mind that you either don’t wash your hands or don’t use soap when you do… and now she is worried about the food and wine you are serving her. Worse, she may not want you to touch her with those dirty hands. FYI worried women have a hard time getting turned on because we are way to up in our heads.
• Wipe down the mirror, sink, counter, floor and shower. Make her feel like she can be at home and relaxed in your space and she might even stay a bit longer…

The kitchen says a lot about you too. It also has the ability to turn her on or off really quickly. If you are cooking dinner for her you want to make sure that the kitchen is clean so that she is thinking more about how sexy you look rather than worrying about how sick she could get from eating your food. Here are some commonly missed things to do before she comes over:

• Wipe down the sink, counters and even the cupboards and handles. It is pretty gross when a girl tries get closer to you, help you cook a little and goes to open a door or drawer and gets her hands all sticky or greasy
• Declutter the counter. Put some of those things you keep out (and likely don’t use that often) in a drawer or cupboard. This makes the whole space appear more clean and presentable. And you might see the hidden dirty that tends to lay beneath.

The bedroom! You may want her to visit this room during her stay, but even if she doesn’t she might check it out and gauge whether or not she would like to visit it in the future. Here are a few things to take care of before she arrives:

• Pick up all your clothes and put them away
• Take down any pictures of ex’s (we think this is logical but you would be surprised how many women have told us that this is an issue). This extends to the rest of the house too!
• Make it a welcoming experience for her by changing the sheets and making the bed.
• We haven’t specifically mentioned the living room, but tidy up, put away the video games, clean the coffee table, and apply the ideas from the other room here too.

2. Set The Mood

Now you’ve cleaned the space, let’s make the space feel cozy – she will notice the little details and appreciate the effort you’ve put in, unless of course you’re being a grade A muppet, in which case she’ll be planning when to hot foot it outta there! Follow these tips:

Saying Hello

Make her feel comfortable from the moment she walks in the door. Smile, give her a kiss on the cheek or a hug (read her body language for this) and invite her in. Ask her how her day has been, and offer her a drink. She will naturally feel vulnerable and nervous, so its up to you to make her feel safe, and excited to spend time with you!

Make it smell nice with an Oojra Reed Diffuser – to prevent your shoes from being the first thing she smells.

• Our sense of smell is strongly tied to emotions, mood and memory, so you will want your place to smell nice, and not with the cheap artificial chemical smelling plugin or spray options. Many of the women we talked to mentioned a bad or good smelling place as one of the stand out things they noticed first when they got to a guy’s place, and it definitely affected how the night went.
• When you’re cleaning your bathroom don’t let bleach be the lingering scent, lavender would be much more pleasant, and much less eye-watering. Try Oojra’s French Provence Lavender reed diffuser.
• For a romantic vibe in the living room, or dining room depending on where you’ll be hanging out, use Jasmine. This will treat her to a lovely sweet, heady scent, although we can’t promise it will cover up the smell of any cooking malfunctions! We recommend Oojra Thai Jasmine Bamboo Essential Oil Reed Diffuser, so you can both enjoy the scent all night long.
• Light a few candles, because everyone looks better in candlelight, even you. It sets a soft romantic atmosphere, and will instantly make the date more intimate and relaxed.

3. Keep it Real – think about it from her perspective

If you are looking for her to actually show up for the date, you have to make sure your initial invite doesn’t sound like a cheesy pick up line; make sure you’re inviting her over for a reason. So rather than saying “Do you want to come over to my place?” add in an activity like “I would like to have you over to my place for dinner, would you be interested?”, or “Do you want to come over on Saturday, we could order pizza and watch that movie you talked about?”. Or even slip the invite in when you’re both talking about a series you love, so maybe you’re excited about the latest Game of Thrones – “Do you want to come over to my place so we can watch it together?”.

Getting the invitation right is really important, so she doesn’t just feel like you’re after one thing. And let’s get real here, if she does come over, and sex is on the cards, you don’t have to be an idiot. Make the effort and treat her with respect from the very beginning and she might just stick around long enough for something great to happen.

So remember guys

• Clean – turn that stinky pad into a welcoming date venue stat!
• Set The Mood – make it smell nice, put some music on and create some ambience – your crappy jokes will only take you so far….
• Keep It Real – We do have pretty good douchebag radar so make sure you consider your dates feelings at all times, show some respect and treat her like the lady she is, that is of course if you want to be treated like the man you think you are.

Good Luck!